We feel loss whenever our life changes unexpectedly in ways that disrupt established behaviors. Sometimes that change is for the better, such as when we move to take up a new job, but often it is painful. That pain makes us aware of benefits and virtues that we may not have fully appreciated, which can be an opportunity for growth and new or more complete relationships.
Hello, I am Brian of Hypnosis Rising. Welcome to this week’s video, “Gaining from Loss”
Loss does not always feel the same. A pink slip may be followed by dizziness and stomach cramps. Theft of a prized possession throws a bolt of anger through the mind. Upon the loss of a loved one, the chest seems to collapse around our heart.
But while those reactions are expected, some people move on, while others seem to be captive to grief. What makes the difference?
One way through is the natural grief studied by Kubler-Ross. Natural grief uses anger to erase old behaviors, preparing us to start anew.
But what if those behaviors are rooted in experiences that were wonderful for us? Do we really want to throw all that away?
A second path through involves resilience and hardiness. Resilience is built upon supportive relationships with intimates, peers, and society. Hardiness is found in the confidence that we can learn, grow, and adapt.
If you feel unable to share your loss with others, a qualified therapist can help you recover your resilience. As for hardiness: if you cannot find a meaningful lesson in your loss, come to Hypnosis Rising. The deepest losses instruct us regarding virtue. When we learn to feel the physical sensations of loss as a shape for the virtues we need restored to our lives, we not only know what we are looking for in the world. We discover that we can become be a conduit for those virtues, even amplifying them in others.
Loss is an opportunity to understand virtue, expanding our sensitivity and discernment. When that growth occurs, it opens a whole new chapter in our lives.